Love Songs For The Hopeless (2000)
The Best That I Can.
Running Out Of Titles.
Twenty Years From Now.
For The Hopeless.
Forget It.
Growing Wings.
Love & Frailties.
Who's Best Interest?
It Happened To Me.
Another Lesson of Youth.
Going Blind.
Awakening, The Last Chapter.
Lyrics.
The Best That I Can.
The writing on the wall says I'm gonna take a fall. No one can save me, I thought I had control. But I was wong. My friends tell me that they strongly disagree. I'll wake up tomorrow & it will be resolved. They may be gone. It doesn't seem the same, all I feel is shame. I'd take it all back if I thought I'd had the chance to go back. I hold myself down because it's what I deserve. Someday I think that I may smile again but I only hope. It may not seem true but it's happening to you. I'd like to help you. only you have control. You hold it all in but it wants to come out. You don't want the pain of being left alone. Well, so long. What do you want me to say? Are you prepared for what I feel inside? What do you want me to say? If you want to hear a lie: "I'm doing fine". Sorry for being me but I'm doing the best that I can. I've made my mistakes, apologies sound great in demand.
Running Out Of Titles.
He dedicated a song to me about how he loved me. He sang with such coviction, I wish I felt the same way about him but I can't & I keep telling him that still, the songs, they keep coming. He's running out of titles & I feel sorry for him. Never steal the heart of a musician, they'll sing songs about you. That's what musicians do. I've heard your new songs & I know who they're about. I can't come to your show tonight, I don't want to be singled out. You'll look right at me when you sing about shattered dreams. I don't deserve their dirty looks & you don't deserve their sympathy. Never break the heart of a musician, they'll sing songs about you. That's what musicians do. I can't come to your show tonight, I can tell when you've lost faith in your songs. I've seen the set list, my song is on it, I'm afraid the spirit of the song will be gone. If the spirits' still there, here we go again, are you're hopes still up? I'm scared... Sing my song anyway you want. Either way, I won't be there. Never get too close to a musician. They'll build their worlds around you. That's what musicians do.
Twenty Years From Now.
You whine & complain `till you get what you want & then you just throw it away. I'm always wrong & your always right, this bullshit is always the same. But the difference between you & me is I'm still the same as I used to be. I'm not saying that my way is right, I'm just speaking my mind. You want it all back but you can't have it back, It's just a battle of time. The things that you did, well you did them with pride or at least they made you smile. You'd give it all up just to fill in the void but today is all that you have. now you're sitting alone waiting by the phone waiting for someone to call. Time, it endears all your dreams & your fears so set yourself up set it high & don't let it fall. If you've got no one else to rely then you're missing out on the best part of your life. I want you back but I can't have you back. I'll keep on fighting all the time. Looking back twenty years from now, won't you see that your life is a lie? working all day for the rest of your life or is that what you had in mind? Everything that you now represent - these words you used to represent. You used to think that the freedom was yours, now you don't have the time.
For The Hopeless.
I woke up today & I found myself seventeen, forced with a reality I hoped would be a bad dream. Tomorrow I'll be twenty-one, it will seem like just one day. I can't help but feel that I've wasted my time away. I tend to look back on my youth as a movie. I missed the pivotal parts, I was busy composing poetry. I finally entered the picture once the credits began to roll, the film was a waste of admission or so I've been told. I'll write another song as my life passes right on, condemned to growing old & hopeless. Crucified to my bed, trying to mute the songs dancing through my head. I'll become a martyr for the hopeless. I read over all the songs that I'd once written. I was a different person then, I can't identify with him. Still I know that he's a part of me, another voice inside my head. I don't look forward to the day when he controls me again. I fell in love with this girl, she changed my whole world. She doesn't love me back & I don't think she ever will. When my heart cracks I'll have no one to blame but myself for trying to live the perfect life, just like everybody else. Happy? I don't belong, so I'll right another song, & learn to fall in love with being hopeless. I may have met the perfect girl but she doesn't belong in my fantasy world. Here's another love song for the hopeless.
Forget It.
You didn't want to play this game again. It's a fact of life, it's play to win. Now you see there's no turning back & you wish someone had told you that. Now you're mad because you passed up the chance, no one to blame but yourself. Don't you dare hold a grudge. You had the best advice in the world. Depressed because you've never gotten love, waiting for someone to pick you up. Well, brace yourself for the pain of being left alone. Don't let the world get you down, nows the time to pick yourself back up. I won't say I'll miss you, I know I'll see you again. Try not to think about the pain. We know your headed to a better place. Don't think about who you leave behind. They'll remember you in time.
Growing Wings.
If I threw a whisper into the wind would you feel compelled to reply?
My assurance in your response being affirmative has withered away over time.
I'm not naive enough to ignore the fact that I've caused us both a lot of pain
but tonight, my dear, tonight I swear I'll take both our pains away.
I've been told that it's just like falling asleep.
If I should find the answers to man's oldest questions
I'll be thinking of you. (always).
If I should drown in a sea of my own sins
I'll be thinking of you (always).
A part of me hopes that a part of you
will be thinking of me (always).
If I'm granted the ability to grow wings
I swear I'll protect you, always.
If I rang the wind chimes which hang from your ceiling
would your heart be convinced of my presence?
If I embraced you as a frost-bitten breeze
would you bless my memory without hesitance?
Will I become just another dull memory
as the days became months? Became years?
I'll always be just five feet above you.
I'll always be the glimmer in your tears.
You forever in my heart, I forever in your dreams.
Love & Frailties.
Love is the largets gift, she's got it in a bow. She just won't give it away, she wants someone who will know... She's tried to find someone but she can't break the curse. She's thought of giving up but then there is the hurt. The emptiness, the hurt, shallow pain of disbelief. She cries herself to sleep - that's when no one sees. She swears she'll meet someone, they'll never let go. She'll look into his eyes, see the truth & then she'll know. No one understands his ways, he says he doesn't care. But being exhiled by the world is a weight that's hard to bear. He'd stand and fight the world, he knows it would fight back. Everything he's tried to do, his frailties attack. Nowhere to point the finger so he points it at himself. Hiding from reality, he puts himself through hell. If only he divulged sincerity in words, he would have gotten the love that he deserves. He's sick & tired of being laughed at. Never had the chance to live like a kid. His intuition tells him he's a failure. Caught between love & frailties, all he needs is a second chance....
Who's Best Interest?
Potluck cover.
It Happened To Me.
Michael doesn't smile no more, he doesn't feel he can. details of his memory make him a somber man. He got himself now where, that you can see, I made a promise to myself that I would never be. We're kind of the same but we've never been good friends, he can't survive without a bottle in his hands. He knows he's got a problem & he says he can't go back. Says that he's sorry & he'd kill me if I turned out like that. He tells me the story of the first time he got high. he doesn't want the same for me - nothing left inside. We've never been close, it's obvious to see but when it all comes down, he is my family. That's when he looked me in the eye & said, "There's no second chance to live life again. You don't understand, this happened to me. It was how it was & how it should be. I've lost all my love, the passion is gone, Now I try to savor everything I've got.
Another Lesson of Youth (a.l.y.)
Do you care to remember the early hours of April 25th?
Starline melts into sunrise, the closest I've ever came to bliss.
Eyes weighed down and bloodshot, yet no risk of falling asleep.
At the time I had a dream, and she was sitting beside me.
I know that a lot of time has passed.
I know that we've both changed.
Even though you're a ghost to my heart
nothing will ever take our sunrise away.
I can't hold the promise I'd made to forget how I felt.
Wouldn't it have been the perfect ending to my private fairy tale?
Joey Cape spoke in words as if mine as we bid farewell to the night.
I appreciated the rising sun for the first time in my life.
I couldn't have claimed not to be stuck in a dream,
or that you felt an ounce of what I'd felt.
I'll always have the pictures, always wear the ring.
They're all that I have left of you now.
Did you take the time to take in the view?
I guess you were just another lesson of youth.
Going Blind.
He was the angel on her shoulder. She was the devil in his heart. When it came to the bottom line it was right, but somebody was too blind. Now that the angels have bared their teeth... How can you live with yourself this time? Now that the angels are going blind? It happens to me all the time. The colors the same as when you went blind. How can you live with yourself this time? It didn't seem fair. It didn't seem right. Tried to walk away but it holds on tight. He'd given up hope. He'd lost it all. He wanted to stand, you made it easy to fall. This is exactly what you wanted. Never to be cheated. Never to be flaunted. Now is a choice, time to decide, you can choose love or go run & hide. How can you live with yourself this time?
Awakening, the Last Chapter.
I spent a ridiculous amount of time trying to define what I felt.
Was it love? Was it infatuation? Why does it seem so unimportant now?
Do I still hold a place in her heart? Do I deserve it if I do?
Is she still listening? If so, here's just one more song for you.
I know that how I acted was wrong,
yet what I felt, so right.
Finally bid farewell to the past,
today is the first day of the rest of my life.
It's much easier to point the finger when you know you're the one to blame.
Words I wish were never said, a paragraph of my life I' happily change.
Does she think of me as the friend, who couldn't hide the fact that he was a monster?
I think of her as the angel I knew before I tried to touch her wings and lost her.
The stars didn't hold the same appeal but if not for her I never would have noticed them.
The angels played a trick on me but if not for her I never would have believed in them.
A collection of love songs for the hopeless, looking back they were all about me.
Learned to battle everything I hate about myself, finally found the courage to set myself free.